Hi there, my name is Hare de Ruyter, I’m 35 years old and this is my application to seek refuge in China. English is not my native language and I'm poorly educated so it will probably be full of spelling errors. My apologies in advance. The reason behind this application is quite complex but I will try to sum it up real quick. It seems the Dutch secret service has more or less been taken over by the Americans and the Jews which resulted in a massive conflict between me and them. They tried to force me to become one of their little puppets and I didn't respond very wel to that hostile recruitment strategy. It's been almost 5 years now since they launched some kind of troll protocol and I'm almost at the end of my rope. In a few weeks I will be evicted from my house because of their actions and I'm pretty sure they buried a dead body underneath my kitchen floor before this house was assigned to me. This may be part of their hostile recruitment strategy. I think they want to let me rot in prison as long as it takes for me to "agree" to work for them. Just to be clear though, I'm not 100% sure there is a dead body but there is a visible crack in the concrete like they poured it twice and a hollow space underneath there that's clearly noticeable when you step on it. I didn't open it up because if there is actually something there and I wouldn't report it to the Police immediately I would already be breaking the law and could be persecuted just for that. I call it a 'trap house' and obviously I don't like being trapped by a bunch of inferior "special" agents that want to force me to become one of them. There is a saying that says the enemy of your enemy is your friend and it seems the Americans and the Jews have got themselves a new enemy and China hopefully a new friend.
But before I'm going to offer you my services when it comes to messing with these common enemies I will first have to mention some possible threats. First of all, I would not be surprised if they are going to try to screw me over again by slipping a bag of heroin in my luggage or one of my pockets to get met executed. This would be a classic Jew move considering the Sassoon and the Kadoorie parasited and destroyed a large part of China back in the day with their opium business leaving you guys very angry with anyone that brings that poison into the country. This is one of the reasons I would prefer to travel to China with some diplomatic escort as protection against these sort of attacks.
Than there is another possible threat which includes me being used as a spy and maybe even an assassin. A while ago I noticed some strange things that could mean I have been bio-hacked. I assume they can take me over at any given moment. I noticed they can trigger erections, put dreams in my head and I think they can make me say things in my sleep as well. I'm not sure what they're planning but I cannot be trusted around important people or with confidential information. Everything I see they see, everything I hear they hear and I'm pretty sure they can even read my mind. I think this is how they tried to create a win-win situation for themselves: I either get executed because of the heroin or I end up working together with you guys and function as their unwilling spy. Even getting executed may work in their advantage according to a very strange theory I came up with. I read that most of you guys are atheist so you can probably handle it without freaking out about it. I call it 'the Jesus curse'. You all know what happened to the Roman Empire when they made the mistake of executing mister Christ right. Well I think that whatever was left of the Romans decided to (re)discover America and give it another shot form over there. Meanwhile they stole the Holy Grail and used the DNA sample to clone Jesus and see if they could use the Jesus curse in their advantage by having one of them being executed by China and get rid of their most powerful enemy that way...
But all of this doesn't have to be a very big problem because I was planning to live in a Buddhist temple anyway. From there I can hardly do any spying and still help you guys out by coming up with strategies that you could use against them and with creative ideas that you can use to protect the Chinese people. Ever since I went through some kind of psychoses a few years ago I became a lot better at coming up with interesting ideas. Let me give you a couple of examples. Before this whole situation I was a 'prepper' and I was preparing for al kinds of bad situations like solar flames, invasions and super volcano eruptions. I don't know what China's protocols are in case of a very powerful solar flame but I can imagine it's one of those things that you don't really think about until it hits. Farmers and other people in the country will probably be fine because they are not depending on electricity. They may actually enjoy such an event because of the beautiful Northern Light effect that comes with it. People in the cities on the other hand will probably be less enthusiastic about a solar flame because of the accompanying Electro Magnetic Pulse that causes shortcuts in everything that runs on electricity and is not specifically protected by a Faraday cage or something in that sense. Communications will be down, streets will be blocked with broken down cars so the supermarkets cannot be re-supplied. It'll probably be a matter of weeks before people start consuming each other. Except for some homicidal cannibals, most people will not enjoy such a situation so I came up with a possible solution. In theory I think you could protect cities with a Faraday shield when you use zeppelins to bring a patchwork of copper mesh very high up in the sky. If you fixate the nets on poles on top of the zeppelins and position them above the clouds you could cover the zeppelins with solar panels and generate electricity even on cloudy days. This way China can become the biggest producer of hydrogen in the world and be a great example to other countries that
are still stuck in that fossil fuel phase.
Then there is the always present threat of being invaded. I heard China has an army of more than 2 million soldiers which sounds like a lot but then again, your country is very large isn't it. Personally I think it's extremely important that the people can defend themselves if necessary and I think I came up with a way that could bring China a potential army of hundreds of millions of somewhat trained civilians that could prevent an invasion. I call it 'racketakking' although I realise that you guys will probably call it 'wackatakking'. It's very similar to paintball but instead of air soft rifles you use real firearms with rubber bullets and protective suits so that the players only get bruises and no actual puncture wounds. You could go high-tech and put some RFID chips or whatever in the bullets so you can keep track of who got hit by who and maybe even lock up the suits and make the helmets go black in case of lethal hits. When you duplicate popular maps from shooter games you can definitely make a lot of money while the people playfully get trained in combat situations. With some 360° camera helmets people from all over the world can spectate championships from a first person point of view and will probably be willing to pay a little bit of money to do so. You can also go old school and stimulate the biodiversity of your beautiful wilderness by using natural rubber and putting seeds in the bullets while competing in the woods or on former farm land. Great for sour losers because they can always claim that they were busy planting seeds instead of missing their target.
Another sun-related disaster is America's dead-man-trigger: The Yellowstone super volcano. I'm pretty sure they positioned a nuclear bomb near the volcano so they can trigger it whenever they want while making it look like a natural disaster. This could be part of their world domination plan considering that all the ash in the atmosphere will block the sun for about 7 years according to scientists. I don't think any country in the world has enough emergency food supplies to cover that time so most people will probably die of starvation unless their governments take drastic measures. I think one of the most effective ways is underground vertical farming on a massive scale. It comes with all kinds of advantages like you can do this in the middle of the city and you're no longer depending on the seasons so you can simulate 3 or 4 summers a year. You could even mix it with a fitness centre where people can generate electricity for the lights while working out. If you dig deep enough there is geothermal heat available to create tropic temperatures and if you locate these farms on gold rich soil it's even more profitable.
Anyway, I'm sure this 'boost' can crack a lot of other problems and I'd like to donate my services to China in exchange of a safe haven where I can grow old. I heard in China it's considered an insult if people refuse food or drinks so I hope you guys can forgive me in advance for being vegan and a non-alcoholic. To make things worse I don't smoke cigarettes and I don't consume coffee and sugar neither. This is because I want to keep my frequency as high as possible and I think it helps with balancing my emotional state and coming up with creative ideas. I never used hard drugs but untill a few months ago I did used to smoke a little bit of marihuana when I came up with some of the ideas I mentioned earlier. But it was only like one small hit every three hours to prevent getting addicted so I have no problem with not being able to smoke weed in China. Meditation in a natural surrounding and some of your famous herbal tea will probably do the trick as well.
But like I said, there are several secret services that may try to screw me over and it's not just the Dutch, the Americans and the Jews but the Saudi's and the Satanists as well (According to one of my theories the Satanists may have tried to turn me into the "Antichrist"). There is a lot of stuff on my Smartphone but I'm not going to take it with me because I'm afraid they're going to hack it and put child pornography or something else illigal on it to get me arrested. Instead I'll just go back to a dumb phone and destroy the Smartphone. I was kind of done with that soulsucking time-bomb anyway. Life was a lot more fun before Smartphones took it over.
Last but not least I want to apologise for some of the things I've said during my psychoses. At the time I was convinced that you guys were about to invade Europe by jumping out of shipping containers and what not. It was a confusing time in which I did and said a lot of strange things. Knowing what I know now I'm pretty sure the Americans were hoping that you would send an assassin in order to stop me from ruining China's reputation even more. Perhaps they triggered the psychoses for that reason. I actualy think I saw her in the supermarket one day. She wore a cap and was a lot smaller than me so I couldn't see her face as she came closer but she had that typical asian walk. Right before she came within touching distance she quickly lifted her head as if to confirm the target and that's when we made eye contact. The amount of hatred in her eyes scared me a bit but I still had smile on my face from greeting somebody else so that might have confused her and change her mind about murdering me. When you think about the possibillity that my 'Jesus curse' theory could be an actual thing, she may one day be remembered in a similar way as that Russian 'Cuba crisis guy' that prevented a third world war by not following protocol.
Anyway, I probably did some damage but I've got every intention to make up for that in terms of positive promotion. America has been demonizing China for a long time and I would also like to help out when it comes to turning the tables on those obnoxious two-faced compulsive masturbators.
To be continued.